October 12, 2015
Saturday we went to the ward activity: La Noche de Naciones. Lots of our investigators, recent converts, and members returning to activity came, and everyone had a wonderful time. The whole stake center gym was decorated with flags and items from the different countries from Central and South America. Members from the ward cooked food native to their home countries. (They even had America, and you know the foods that were on the table? Hot dogs and root beer. I feel so sad for my country.) I made my Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Cake mix cookie bars, and they went fast.
One thing I have been experiencing a lot on my mission is this struggle within myself. I wish I were nicer to myself and could just breathe away the stress. I just worry so much. Yesterday I was fasting for guidance, and I applied Elder Lawrence’s invitation from his talk last week. I feel like I need to also study Elder Nelson’s talk about the influence of covenant keeping women. And I need to read my patriarchal blessing everyday again. I haven’t done that for a while, so I need to do that again. And probably I should make a plan and replace any discouraging thoughts with positive thoughts and hum to myself a hymn to help me.
I have been serving for almost 14 months in the mission, and still I am learning and have much more to learn. I just hope the Lord won’t let my mistakes get in the way of these families progressing in the gospel and establishing their conversion deeper in the foundation of Christ.
One thing for which I am grateful is that here in the United States I can keep in contact with more people through technology, and after the mission I can easily drive up and visit. Hermana Peterson and I are seeing more miracles here. It’s so beautiful to see the light grow in the eyes of the families we visit. These families will forever be in my heart.
Hermana Kathleen Billings